Saturday, January 26, 2013

A New Day

 Yesterday was a bad day. Nothing bad happened, but I was bombarded all day with negative
thoughts, and temptations to do things I know aren't good for me. I gave in to some of them. I can be so weak. But today is a new day. I'm thankful that I just have a few bad days now and then. I used to have bad years. I'm thankful for lessons Jesus has taught me about keeping my mind focused on Him
and thinking that I'm holding on to His right hand as I go through my day. If I do those things today, then today will be a good day. As long as Jesus' presence is with me every second & step of my day.
"Let me hear of Your Unfailing Love each morning, for I am trusting You. Show me where to walk,
for I give myself to You. Rescue me from my enemies, Lord; I run to You to hide me. Teach me to do Your Will,  for You are my God.May Your Gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing",
 Psalm 143:8-10. NLT

Friday, January 18, 2013

Feeling Joy

   Joy has been elusive in my life. Growing up as I did, victimized by abuse, I can't ever remember feeling lighthearted or carefree. Sexual abuse is a heavy load for a child to carry and I was bent down under the weight of it.
   Then I grew up, and God healed me from much of that shame. But still, feeling joy was as foreign to me as feeling pure. Until this past year. Along with that pinching nerve pain in my back came a new understanding of grace. One I could live with. It doesn't matter how good I am. What matters is how good my Jesus is.
   After a lifetime of fear, negative thinking, and beating myself up, I've learned to be fully present in the simple moments of my day. And that is where, unexpectedly, joy shows up: in the sunbeams dancing across the tile floor; in the beautiful redness of the Northern Cardinal as he lands on my feeder; in my little dog seeking out the best spot to sunbathe; even in the bleating of the cows next door.
   This professed city girl has embraced fully this country life that I moved into back before Christmas. I've been feeling so good that I start to feel guilty. I've been feeling so good that I start looking for the next bad thing. Then I remember my new understanding of grace. I don't have to fear being punished because I'm not good enough. I don't have to try doing enough good things so that I won't be punished. Jesus' goodness forgives my sins and loves me just as I am. And when I remember that, then I can feel joy.

"I pray that God, the source of hopr, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit", Romans 15:13. NLT 

Friday, January 11, 2013

Fearing the Flu

   Whenever I have listened to the news this week, I have become afraid when they talk about the flu epidemic in our country. I'm afraid my husband and I might get it. I'm afraid my chidlren and precious grandchildren might come down with it.
    It's scary because it's out of my control. There's nothing I can do about it. I have to trust God. There was a time when irrational fear dominated my thinking. One bad thought would sneak in and grow until before I knew it, I was sliding down into that familiar downward spiral of depression and despair.
   But Jesus has changed me. I'm in a better place now. I can pray. I can trust. I can give the situation to God. I can turn my back on irrational fear and not allow it to get a foothold. I can choose to live in the moments of each day. I can choose joy.
   "But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in You. I praise God for what He has promised. I trust in God, so why should I be afraid? What can mere mortals do to me?", Psalm 56:3-4. NLT
   "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you", IPeter 5:7.
   "I am the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,"Do not fear. I will help you", Isaiah 41:13.

Friday, January 4, 2013


   There is a book out called "One Word That Will Change Your Life". It challenges you to ask God for a word that you can focus on as you work out His purpose for your life in the new year.
   The word that God has brought to my mind is "new". I.m praying that I see a lot of that word in my life in 2013.
*We are enjoying the new house we have moved in to.
*I'm looking for new victories over my back pain.
*I'm praying for a new attitude toward life.
*I'm asking God to help me with new thought patterns (positive and not negative).
*I've long been praying that God will take away my heart of stone (since the abuse) and give me a new heart. Maybe this is the year. No, I say, this is the year. With God's help.
"And I will give you a new heart and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender responsive heart", Ezekiel 36:26.