Monday, July 29, 2013

"Hide Your Crazy"

   "Run and hide your crazy and start acting like a lady" .That verse from Miranda Lambert"s song, "Mama's Broken Heart", has been running around in my mind. I say that a lot to my dog, Grace the Border Collie. She is the sweetest and most loving puppy-until she isn't. She does have a streak of
     It makes me think back to the years of my life when I was trying to "hide my crazy and act like a lady". You just can't hide things like sexual abuse,  I taught Bible classes, and went to women's conferences, trying hard to hide how different and damaged I felt inside. It wasn't until I was almost 50 and shared the abuse for the first time with my Alanon sponsor that I began to heal.
     Praise God! When I couldn't hide the craziness any longer, Jesus showed up. When I brought my old stuff out into the open, Jesus shined His light on it and He healed me step by step. "He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along", Psalm 40:2.
     I no longer have to "hide my crazy". Jesus is making me into the woman that He created me to be.
"This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new  person. The old life has gone, the new life has begun", 2 Corinthians 5:17.

Monday, July 22, 2013


   I've been thinking a lot this summer about how much I really need. I identify with the little girl in the AT&T commercial who says, "If we like it, we want more! We want more!" That's me! If I like the way a pair of JJill linen pants fit me then I want them in 3 more colors. If 6 solar lights look good on my front walkway then I get 2 dozen more plus a butterfly and a sun and a moon. For crying out loud, I have 4 sets of dishes for my husband and myself to eat on.
   Excess. Greed. Not pretty words. "Their lives became full of every kind of wickedness, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, quarreling, deception, malicious behavior, and gossip", Romans 1:29. Greed is defined as "a selfish and excessive desire for more of something than is needed.
   I'm going to a Bible study of Jen Hatmaker's book "The 7 Experiment". She takes 7 areas of her life and identifies the excess in that area. She then takes steps to rid herself of what is not needed and give to people who do need it
   I'm overwhelmed. I'm struck mindless. I don't know where to start. But God does. It starts with Jesus, with putting Him first, with surrendering all to Him. "So don't worry about these things, saying "What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear? These things dominate the minds of unbelievers, but your Heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need", Romans 6:31-33.

Monday, July 8, 2013


"He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint", Isaiah 40:29-31. My pastor used these verses Sunday and it got me to thinking about eagles. A few times since we've moved to the farm we've spotted a pair of bald eagles in the tree line at the edge of our pasture, along a creekbed. Regal looking, the bald eagle is a symbol of freedom in the USA and our national bird. Eagles have long fascinated me. I love how they can just spread their enormous (7 foot)wings and soar on wind drafts at speeds of 35-75 mph; searching for prey with their sharp eyesight. That's a picture of how God wants us to surrender everything to Him and then just go with the flow, soaring on the wind drafts of the Holy Spirit. Eagles mate for life and share the duties of building their quite large (up to 8 feet) nests, which they continue to use and add to year after year. We humans can certainly learn from them in this area. My favorite thing about eagles is what I read one time. If they have ingested something toxic or poisonous they will lay on a rock and spread their feathers out to the sunshine and let the sun draw the poison out of them. I try to follow suit. If I have let some bad thoughts or besetting sins create toxic feelings in me, I will sit for as long as it takes in the presence of Jesus, my Son-shine, and in His Word, until those bad feelings are replaced with His joy. I can also identify with their molting. The eagles molt in patches, taking a year to replace their feathers. They start at the head and work down. God has been transforming my heart, slowly, for years. He starts with my mind and replaces the negative thoughts with God-centered ones. It is a process. Yes, there is a lot we can learn from eagles. God spoke often of eagles in His Word. "You have seen what I did to the Egyptians. You know how I carried you on eagles' wings and brought you to Myself", Exodus 19:4. "Like an eagle that rouses her chicks and hovers over her young, so He spread His wings to take them up and carried them safely on His pinions", Deuteronomy 32:11.