After I was sexually abused as a small child, I grew up feeling dead and empty inside. Something of my essence had been taken away and there was nothing to replace it. I became a Christian later and was told the Holy Spirit would come to live in me, as He did in all believers. I believed this because the Bible said it was so, but I never felt like the Holy Spirit lived in me. I wasn't even living in me, how could the Holy Spirit be?
This spring, as my heart has been opened up by teachings about God's grace, and as I've made a conscious effort to keep my eyes on Jesus, an incredible thing has happened. I've begun to develop a relationship with the Holy Spirit. For the first time in my life, I've talked to Him, I've felt His presence, I've prayed with Him, I've lovd Him. It's been nothing short of amazing.
Charles Spurgeon expresses it well: "Even so it is beyond all ordinary rules that I, a poor, helpless, undone sinner, should find grace to bear about in my soul the indwelling Spirit of the Lord Jesus. I, who once despaired, as well I might, for my nature was as dry, and withered, and barren, and accursed as a howling wilderness, even I have been made to bring forth fruit unto holiness. Well may my mouth be filled with joyous laughter, because of the singular surprising grace which I have received of the Lord."
"And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever-the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept Him, because it neither sees Him or knows Him. But you know Him, for He lives with you and will be in you", John 14-16. NIV