Monday, November 14, 2011
When I began my descent, as a teenager, into all things that could numb the pain, I looked in the mirror and saw someone who had no value except for being desired by boys. And so began the downward spiral that masqueraded as my life for quite some time.
Later, after I married and had chidlren, I didn't take the time to look at myself in the mirror much at all. Preferring instead to lift my children to the mirror and find my value in them.
In middle age, when God led me step by step through healing from the abuse, He unraveled layer after layer of blame, shame, guilt, loss, anger, and grief. When He got down to that final core of unbelief that I could be loved by Him and showed me He did love me-enough to die for me, out popped a new me. For the first time in my life, I could look in the mirror and see someone I liked.
Now, when I look in the mirror, I see someone who is growing old, someone not valued by our society, someone who is wearing out. But if I look through Jesus' eyes, I can also see someone who is looking a little bit more like Him, someone who sees perseverance in those grey hairs and wisdom in those wrinkles, someone who values a gentle and peaceful spirit more than a whistle from the guy on the corner. And I'm looking forward to that glorious day when I will be made an immortal body like His.
"So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord-who is the Spirit-makes us more and more like Him as we are changed into His glorious image", 2 Corinthians 3:18, NLT.