It's now February. I've been doing this blog for two years. That is beyond amazing to me for many reasons. The first being that someone of my age and limited tech savvy could even get it started. I remember being snowed in the day of my first post, I remember all the excuses I came up with for not doing it. And I remember clearly feeling like God had said, "Do it. Now. Today."
I remember how good it felt to publish that first post. I also remember the fears I had of putting my "stuff" out "there" for anyone to read. I remember praying to God that I would let Him give me the words to write and I would let Him be in control of everything else. Because, you see, this blog is a thing between Jesus and me and I would do it if noone ever read it. For Him.
I was so depressed that dreary, snowy day two years ago. Since then, I've gained a new understanding of Grace. It hasn't come easy. Nothing ever is for me. I'm stubborn and rebellious at best and addictive and self-destructive at worst.
Last May, I was on my knees in tears, broken. I was begging God to take my life because I was in so much back pain that I didn't think I could go on. That was when Grace slipped in, shined through, picked me up, and carried me along. I stand in awe because of the good place I am in now. Because of Jesus. And I'm so very thankful for the friends I've made through my blog. He really does have "the whole world in His hands".
"Praise the Lord! For He has heard my cry for mercy. The Lord is my Strength and Shield. I trust Him wiuth all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with Joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving", Psalm 28:6-7. NLT